Helping

Book excerpt: A Strategy+Business Best Leadership Book of the Year: An “uncommonly wise” analysis of the psychological and social dynamics of helping relationships (Warren Bennis, author of On Becoming a Leader). Helping is a fundamental human activity, but it can also be a frustrating one. All too often, to our bewilderment, our sincere offers of help are resented, resisted, or refused—and we often react the same way when people try to help us. Why is it so difficult to provide or accept help? How can we make the whole process easier? Many words are used for helping: assisting, aiding, advising, caregiving, coaching, consulting, counseling, guiding, mentoring, supporting, teaching, and more. In this seminal book on the topic, corporate culture and organizational development guru Ed Schein analyzes the social and psychological dynamics common to all types of helping relationships, explains why help is often not helpful, and shows what any would-be helpers must do to ensure that their assistance is both welcomed and genuinely useful. He shows how to navigate the delicate acts of asking for or offering help; avoid pitfalls; mitigate power imbalances; and establish a solid foundation of trust—and how these techniques can be applied to teamwork and organizational leadership. From the bestselling author of Organizational Culture and Leadership, and illustrated with examples from many types of relationships—husbands and wives, doctors and patients, consultants and clients—Helping is a concise, definitive analysis of what it takes to establish successful, mutually satisfying helping relationships.