Parsnips, Buttered

Book excerpt: **THE ESSENTIAL & IRREVERENT BOOK FROM AWARD-WINNING COMEDIAN AND STAR OF JOE LYCETT'S GOT YOUR BACK AND THE GREAT BRITISH SEWING BEE ** Also seen on Epic Win, The Time it Takes, 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown and Taskmaster. He's seen everywhere in fact. 'Joe is nothing short of hilarious' SARAH MILLICAN 'I Lycett, I Lycett a lot' HARRY HILL 'We were snorting with laughter like a happy pig throughout. Lots more of the same please Joe! 5*s' HEAT MAGAZINE * * * * * * Dear Reader, Life is hard. We are a bombarded generation: Facebook, billboards, Twitter, Instagram, taxes, newspapers, watches monitoring our sleep, apps that read our pulse, terrorism. There's such an onslaught to the senses these days it's a marvel any of us manage to get out of bed. I love bed. While we are overwhelmed and confused by the miasmic cloud of information, there are those that seek to take advantage: there are parking fines, hate Tweets, Nigerian email scams and Christmas newsletters from old school friends about their ugly kids. And just as we're getting round to doing something about it, we're distracted again. I, Joe Lycett, comedian, wordsmith, and professional complainer, am here to help. During my short life of doing largely nothing I've discovered solutions to many of life's problems, which I impart to you, dear Reader. Containing a centurion of complaint letters to unsuspecting celebrities, companies and anyone brave enough to clog up my phone, as well as illustrations, one-liners , jokes and life hacks, this little gem offers you a collection of tips and advice* for all manner of modern woe. By the time you have finished reading this book you will have learnt how to: - Reverse a parking fine - Manipulate the tabloid press - Navigate social media - Respond to hate mail - Out-weird internet trolls - Contest a so-called ripe avocado - Send the perfect Christmas newsletter - Defeat ISIS - Take down multi-national companies AND MUCH, MUCH MORE! Joe Lycett x * If you are looking for guidance with taxes, quitting smoking, moving house, love, divorce, education, healthcare or anything actually important may I recommend speaking to friends or family members and not consulting a book by a comedian who eats halloumi at least twice a day.