The Courage to Trust

Book excerpt: You’re probably familiar with the old saying, once bitten, twice shy. It describes a painful uncertainty many of us feel every day as we try to engage with other people. Acts of betrayal from our pasts can lead us into long cycles of wariness and mistrust. An inability to trust wisely can lead us to loneliness and isolation, or worse—putting our trust in the wrong people too easily. The good news is that the ability to trust is both a choice and a skill that you can develop. You do not have to be controlled by the past. To a child, trust is a feeling that comes and goes, always under the influence of other people. Only as an adult can you learn how and when to trust more wisely. This book is a warm and friendly guide to achieving greater self-confidence and deeper levels of intimacy and trust. Helped along by the book’s exercises and ideas for self-reflection, you’ll begin to develop new patterns of trust. Start by getting comfortable trusting your own instincts. Then, experiment with developing relationships based on mutual trust and curiosity. Learn from and then let go of old betrayals that have impaired your trust-building skills, and approach the rest of your life with a renewed sense of purpose and belonging.